Friday 17 December 2010

Thursday 12 August 2010

I feel really really uneasy in my own situation today; not that i am in any situation, i just mean the whole being alive in this time span situation.
I woke up with a gammy eye because i was too drunk to remember to take my contact lenses out and also got 3 hours sleep and woke up to a chirpy bird on the roof. I receieved a late birthday present in the form of a soundless super8 camera. I have thought up some things i would like to film with it including:
An extremely beautiful auburn haired lady with blue eyes and pale skin and freckles sucking on a lemon and pulling horrid faces.
A flock of birds (crows?) taking off in flight at the same time from a dry field with no trees anywhere and maybe a power cable in the distance.
A curly haired person in a bath tub with a bubble beard .
A semi nude scrawny person jumping off a bridge into a river.
Possibly a slow motion nose bleed in a kitchen with black and white tiled floors.

Veyr miexd up. what in the frosted fig is going on with my head today? I read a metro newspaper yesterday and i tore out some articles. One of them was about a child who was stillborn in mexico and they put him in a morgue for a week then at the funeral he woke up and started crying and they took him to hospital and he died of oxygen starvation from being on a cold slab in a metal box for a week. Also, a man who is paralysed from the neck down has spent a year developing a guitar you can play with your face muscles alone and he can play it from his hospital bed.
And my mum didnt lick her lid of life today and i wish everyone would just lick the yoghurt lid, so i didnt havr to do it for them. I will go around the world with nothing but my tongue and a lust for yoghurts and change lives by being a motivational speaker about lthe benefits of licking the lid of life. I could write a self help book " life is a yoghurt"; if you do one thing worth doing today, make it be licking the lid of life.
Whislt thinking about the size of childrens yoghurts i got a thought of like bald heads around a bar and they say "5 shots of your finest" and then the camera spans out and its 5 babies stood in a dolls house in nappies shotting much bunch. That'd be an amazing advert for much bunch maybe i should send it in as a suggestion.

Friday 6 August 2010

After intensive research i have found some pictures of possible future abodes.


I know that theres a vast difference between a treehouse shack and a victorian mansion but i would be happy with either.

Thursday 5 August 2010